If you’re like most women considering surrogacy, one of your first thoughts may be something along the lines of, “Can I handle this?” Surrogacy is indeed a big undertaking, but we promise, it is so well worth it.
How do you know if you’d make a great gestational surrogate?
Here’s a look at ten characteristics that make a woman an ideal surrogate.
1. You’re a mom already
This is a big deal in surrogacy. Not only because it can help with the emotional side of the process, but also because it shows your intended parents that your body is capable of becoming pregnant and carrying a healthy pregnancy to term. Unfortunately, even if your heart is in the right place, if you’re not already a mom, you’re not ideal for surrogacy.
2. You’re motivated by empathy
Will you be compensated for being a surrogate? Yes. Should that be the primary reason that you’re motivated to do it? Absolutely not. This is a long process that, while incredibly emotionally satisfying, can be stressful and trying at times. If you’re in it for the money, you won’t stay in it long enough to make money. You’ll also be unhappy. And we don’t want that for you. Instead, you should be motivated to help by the desire to help others have a family of their own.
3. You have your partner’s support
If you are in a committed relationship, marriage or just seriously dating, it is important that you have your partner’s support. This person will be impacted by your choice to become a surrogate as well, and you need them on board. Having a strong support system will help your journey be more fulfilling.
4. You’re organized
Being a gestational surrogate means that you’re going to have to endure at least one cycle of IVF. That means a lot of medications taken every day, some at very specific times. Additionally, you’ll also have to make and keep several doctor appointments. Simply put, being a surrogate can feel like a full-time job. Being organized makes this feel less overwhelming and much more manageable.
5. You’re financially stable
In addition to not being motivated by fiscal gain, it also helps if you’re not in fiscal need. We aren’t saying that you need to be wealthy, but it is important that you’re not currently accepting any form of government aid, such as food stamps, cash aid, or Medicaid/Medicare. If you are, that can give the illusion of need and suggest that women are being led into this for money, when they otherwise would not consider surrogacy. If you have additional questions on what it means to be financially stable, don’t hesitate to reach out to us.
6. You’re compassionate
If you’ve ever known someone who has struggled with infertility, it’s not hard to understand how difficult this process can be for intended parents. Surrogacy represents a lifelong dream for them, and on top of the emotional toll, this process can take a huge hit on a family’s finances as well. Being sensitive to their needs and concerns will make you a great surrogate, and an even better friend.
7. You love being pregnant
It’s the one thing all of our surrogates have in common. Not only do they love being pregnant, but they’re also pretty great at it! The best surrogates are the ones who enjoy the process of pregnancy, and perhaps even the childbirth process itself. Many of our surrogates tell us that they became a surrogate simply because they knew that their own families were complete, but they wanted to be pregnant just one more time.
8. You’re a great communicator
During the course of your surrogacy, you will be asked to communicate with a lot of people. Not only will you need to keep your own family up to date on what’s going on, but you’ll also be asked to communicate with us about your journey. On top of that, the intended parents will very likely enjoy talking to you about your appointments and pregnancy as well. Each audience that you speak with will be a little different of an approach to the same story. It really helps if you’re a strong communicator.
9. You’re flexible
Here’s the thing about surrogacy. It’s all kind of a big waiting game. There will be a hurry up and wait going on, as your dates will be dependent on things that we only have so much control over. You will have a much better experience if you’re able to be flexible and “go with the flow” as you progress through your journey. See the qualification below this article.
10. You meet all the other qualifications
There are a lot of guidelines for surrogates. These rules are set forth by the fertility clinics that we work with, and many of the guidelines are the result of the American Society of Reproductive Medicine. In short, that means that if you don’t meet the basic requirements, we won’t be able to work with you as a surrogate. So, what are these basic requirements? We will get into that later.
So, do you see yourself described above? If so, take a deep breath. Looks like you’re in a great place to be considering surrogacy, and we’re so grateful that you’re here. The next step is often the scariest. That step is making your first move. You can go ahead and fill out on your online application, here. Or, if you have more questions, feel free to contact us to chat. It’s free, and we’re always excited to meet new potential surrogates. Email us anytime at , or call us at 1-844-404-BABY.
Interested in becoming a surrogate? See if you meet the qualifications.
Wondering what the surrogacy process looks like from start to finish? Click here to see the surrogacy journey laid out step-by-step.